Nopesport

Good evening my good men and women. I have decided that for my second instalment of samsonite's picks i shall challenge your mind slightly with a series of questions. Here goes -

Why is it that people say things like "She's got an amazing voice" as if that makes an awful band better? Take Evanesence for example. Now let's not beat around the bush, they're bloody awful. Their carefully plotted blend of the softest metal since Jovi and poppy sensibilities was always going to do well with the under 16 crowd. But when i hear people i know, people who should know better saying to me, "Oh i like them, she's got an amazing voice" as if that excuses their crime, i have to despair slightly. Same goes for Anastasia.

Why does the music from an aftershave advert almost reduce me to tears whenever I hear it? i don't know what this song is called or who the artist is but it just gets me. Does anyone know the one I mean? It's a guy with an acoustic guitar and has a line that is something like "may god's love be with you" and it's not actually that sad, just makes me sad. Its on the ad for Davidoff Echo. Please post on the forum if you can help me. But why is that? Why do random things make you sad every time? I really don't like it much. It's rubbish.

Talking of advert music, why are T-Mobile using some sort of faux orchestral version of Motorcycle Emptiness by Manic Street Preachers? I will never forgive Bradfield for this, or his permission for Australia to be used in an Australian Tourist Board advert. It's just wrong.

Why did they have to go and make "Legally Blonde 2"? Was the first one not punishment enough?

When will Graham Norton just f**k off? Yes he is funny. The first time. Not every night for years.

When will every one bow down and worship at the gates of Duran Duran? Ordinary World is the best song ever written (the acoustic version). With this whole 80s revival going down, surely their time has come.

Why oh why would we want more Best of... albums? They're so half-assed. Apart from Bruce Springsteen.

Why is there is a seen from the film Secretary with James Spader in the Channel 4 Greatest Sexy Moments programme? If you have seen the film, you'll know that it is neither sexy or funny as the critics would have you believe. If you haven't seen it, don't.

How can a production company make such a hash of a David Mamet screenplay? State and Main is awful, yet was written my a genius of our era. Unbelieveable.

That's enough questions for now me thinks. Which just leaves me to pick some culture for you lovely little people. Go listen to the first Sluts of Trust single on Chemical Underground records, buy the Best of Duran Duran, watch Robocop 3 and Swingers (apparently loads of people i know have never witnessed the genius of this film), and read Adbusters magazine, some of it is right on the mark, some of it is hilarious. Oh and O Brother Where Art Thou? is on TV soon, watch it, it's incredible, even Clooney is good in it.

Now i'm off to throw stones at Michael Jackson.

Ta ta my lovelies.